Tuesday, August 25, 2009
For kids' sake, SOME dads need to be discouraged from involvment (Indianapolis, Indiana)
Stuart Showalter, a well-known white supremacist/fathers rights advocate in Indiana, has published a piece at indystar.com called "For kids' sake, don't discourage dad's involvement."
It's a rather stupid argument. Nobody discourages the involvement of a dad who has been loving and committed from the beginning. Most of these dads are still in happy marriages with the mothers of their children. A few had more-or-less amicable separations or divorces, but continue to play an active role because everybody desires it and sees it as a good thing.
That doesn't mean that "shared parenting" should be forced down the throat of every mother and child, or that every dad's involvement is always a good thing. There's no reason to get dogmatic and rigid, and ignore the individual dad's track record.
That's saying all dads are equally the same and equally as good. Think about that. The unemployed druggie who beat his wife and kids is just as good as the guy who was a steady worker, stayed married to the same mom for 30 years, read to the kids every night, and coached Little League? Give me a break.
Want ten quick examples--just from Indiana--of dads where the kids might have been better off if Dad hadn't been "involved"?
1) Katron Walker of Vigo County: Abducted his two kids, killed 4-year-old son in June 2006.
2) Joshua Todd Hildebrand of Williamsburg: Smashed windshield of car with gun, hit 3-month-old daughter in head. Baby has serious brain injuries.
3) Donald Medsker of Fort Wayne: Fathered 7 kids with his own sister. He had custody of the sister from age 11.
4) Ronald Bonahannon of Midland: Shot and killed his 16-month-old son; tried to blame a "stranger."
5) John A. Jeffers of Bloomfield: Accused of homicide in death of 5-month-old son.
6) Terry Bethel of Gary: Accused in murder of 13-month-old son.
7) Michael Stayer of Whitestown: Beat wife to death with 5-year-old son as witness.
8) William Foster of Beech Grove: Killed 4-month-old son.
9) Joseph Warnock of Brownsburg: Killed wife in front of 2 daughters.
10) Matthew D. Schutz of Lafayette: Accused of killing 15-week-old daughter.
Enough said.
It's a rather stupid argument. Nobody discourages the involvement of a dad who has been loving and committed from the beginning. Most of these dads are still in happy marriages with the mothers of their children. A few had more-or-less amicable separations or divorces, but continue to play an active role because everybody desires it and sees it as a good thing.
That doesn't mean that "shared parenting" should be forced down the throat of every mother and child, or that every dad's involvement is always a good thing. There's no reason to get dogmatic and rigid, and ignore the individual dad's track record.
That's saying all dads are equally the same and equally as good. Think about that. The unemployed druggie who beat his wife and kids is just as good as the guy who was a steady worker, stayed married to the same mom for 30 years, read to the kids every night, and coached Little League? Give me a break.
Want ten quick examples--just from Indiana--of dads where the kids might have been better off if Dad hadn't been "involved"?
1) Katron Walker of Vigo County: Abducted his two kids, killed 4-year-old son in June 2006.
2) Joshua Todd Hildebrand of Williamsburg: Smashed windshield of car with gun, hit 3-month-old daughter in head. Baby has serious brain injuries.
3) Donald Medsker of Fort Wayne: Fathered 7 kids with his own sister. He had custody of the sister from age 11.
4) Ronald Bonahannon of Midland: Shot and killed his 16-month-old son; tried to blame a "stranger."
5) John A. Jeffers of Bloomfield: Accused of homicide in death of 5-month-old son.
6) Terry Bethel of Gary: Accused in murder of 13-month-old son.
7) Michael Stayer of Whitestown: Beat wife to death with 5-year-old son as witness.
8) William Foster of Beech Grove: Killed 4-month-old son.
9) Joseph Warnock of Brownsburg: Killed wife in front of 2 daughters.
10) Matthew D. Schutz of Lafayette: Accused of killing 15-week-old daughter.
Enough said.