Stop the Hurt: Why abusers abuse (Klamath Falls, Oregon)

Too many sicko daddies like MARTIN ROMERO in this world.

http://www.heraldandnews.com/news/local_news/article_2b0205c6-a5d9-11e0-afaf-001cc4c03286.html

Stop the Hurt: Why abusers abuse
Why abusers abuse
Abusers often rationalize their behavior to themselves.

Posted: Monday, July 4, 2011 9:00 am

By ELON GLUCKLICH H&N Staff Reporter Herald and News
A 12-member jury said he was guilty.

But Martin Romero refused to believe it.

He had just listened to a week of testimony from medical experts and his 17-year-old daughter describing years of sexual abuse that started when she was 4 years old.

The physical evidence was overwhelming. The girl had internal injuries consistent with sexual abuse over a long period of time.

She told investigators that her father would rationalize the abuse by saying, "All fathers have sex with their daughters." She said he believed that since she was his daughter, he could do what he wanted.

The victim's family told her she was lying. Experts said she wasn't. Her father was sent to prison in October 1999 for 35-1/2 years.

A little more than four years later, the victim killed herself. She left a suicide note, asking God for forgiveness. Her father is still trying to appeal his conviction.

The Romero case is one of several child abuse examiner Dr. Janey Purvis has seen end in suicide in her 16 years working in the Klamath Falls area.

And even if victims don't commit suicide, the abuse has lasting impacts, she said.

“Most of these kids slowly kill themselves with drugs and alcohol,” Purvis said.

The mind of abusers can transform heinous physical and sexual abuse into common practices and grown men convince themselves the repeated rape of a child is acceptable, even appropriate, experts say.

And, experts say, Martin Romero’s repeated attempts to appeal his conviction — despite the physical evidence and a unanimous jury verdict — shows how deeply the denial can run in the mind of an abuser.

In Klamath County, there were 32 confirmed cases of child sex abuse last year.

Law enforcement and child welfare advocates investigated 169 cases — roughly one every other day.

Overall, two of every 100 children in the county were physically abused, sexually abused or neglected in 2010 — a rate that exceeds Oregon’s average by 50 percent.

“All of these cases are bad,” Purvis said. “But I’ve seen a few that have been horrific.”

The mental torture experienced by an abuse victim is a sharp contrast to the psychological factors present in an abuser.

Victims feel guilt or shame, but abusers rationalize their behavior, denying that their actions are wrong, experts say.

No one common trait

There’s no one common trait that can help local law enforcement and child welfare advocates pick out an abuser.

But, authorities say, those caught committing abuse fall into several categories: They’re typically males. They are usually relatives or friends of the family whose child they abuse. And, more often than not, the abusers convince themselves there’s nothing wrong with what they’re doing.

“A lot of sex abusers have errors of thinking,” Purvis said. “They can justify their behavior. Sometimes they say they’re showing the child love, they say, ‘What could be wrong with that?’ They just don’t think they’re doing anything wrong.”