Don't turn a blind eye to vital clues (Melbourne, Australia)

TERRIFIC op-ed by Sally Bennet at the Herald Sun (Australia).

A lot of the points she makes we have stressed here (but she does it with more eloquence):

1) "Snapping" is a myth. Murder and violence almost always include long histories of abuse that have increased in severity over time.

2) "Family breakdown" or "custody disputes" or divorce do not cause violence. Rather, it is violence that causes the breakdown of relationships.

Hat tip to "a friend."

http://www.heraldsun.com.au/opinion/dont-turn-a-blind-eye-to-vital-clues/story-e6frfhqf-1225853841843

Don't turn a blind eye to vital clues
Sally Bennett
From: Herald Sun April 15, 2010 12:00AM

FEW crimes are more shocking and more incomprehensible than that of a parent killing their own child.

It is the ultimate betrayal and it shakes us to the core. We imagine what those precious little souls went through, their screams and their fear, and we think the world has gone mad.

And then, once the shock subsides, our sense of horror and helplessness starts to permeate.

Until another incident just like it forces it back into public consciousness and we once again despair at the senseless loss.

But links aren't made, patterns aren't seen, conclusions aren't drawn and action does not seem to be taken.

We are not helpless bystanders here. There is much we can do to stop the slaughter of children, otherwise known as filicide - the ugliest and most deplorable form of domestic and family violence.

The reality is that these crimes don't ever come out of nowhere. There is no such thing as a "brain snap" or a "moment of madness". These are myths. There is often a long history of abuse (either towards the children or their other parent), or mental instability, that gradually increases in severity.

More often than not there are clear, predictable warning signs. These are generally preventable crimes, and therein lies the real tragedy. Often, it's brutally clear-cut. The perpetrator makes a threat and carries it out.

More than 120 Australians are killed by a family member every year. Roughly one in every five is a child.

Some people blame the strain of family breakdown and child custody disputes, or the stress of modern life. But it is not the breakdown of relationships that causes violence; instead, it is violence that causes relationship breakdown.

Some children are killed during court-ordered contact time, despite those same courts being aware of the other parent's concerns for the children's safety.

In the bigger picture though, divorce is not a common denominator in domestic homicide. A history of abuse, an escalation of abuse, and threats to harm or kill are.

So this is not a battle of the sexes or parental rights. Men who have suffered terribly through divorce and custody battles are not the same men who end up killers.

Domestic and family violence is an entirely different beast - a misunderstood and mistreated social disease, the cost of which is put at more than $13 billion a year.

It requires a whole-of-community response to plug the gaps between crime investigation and crime prevention.

We need a co-ordinated response to family violence between all agencies and departments that deal with it. That means cohesion between police, courts, health workers, domestic violence services, child protection services, mental health services and the coroner's office.

We need attitudinal change to create a society that is intolerant of abuse in the home and acts to stamp it out. That means helping people dealing with family issues, not turning a blind eye, or thinking it's none of our business.

Do interfere and do help. Safety in the home is everyone's business.

Sally Bennett is a Herald Sun journalist